Tuesday, April 6, 2010

New Moore Is No More : The Beauty Of Global Warming!

Bill Waterson's Calvin and Hobbes

(Click on the strip to expand in another window and read it more legibly)

Please choose the correct answer :
What is the name of the Island under dispute between India and Bangladesh which was mentioned in Paragraph No.: 9 of the Joint Press Statement issued by the Hon'ble Ministers of External Affairs of India and Bangladesh at Dhaka on the 18th of August, 1980 AD?
(a) New Moore
(b) South Talpatti
(c) Purbasha
(d) All the above

Such intellectually challenging (rather, challenged!) questions would gradually be out of vogue from the competitive examinations being conducted to recruit Lord Thomas Babington Macaulay's clerks of various ilk in both India and Bangladesh.

Wonder why?


This Island has disappeared into the sea!


New Moore Island (a.k.a. Purbasha in India and South Talpatti in Bangladesh) was an island of about 3 x 3 km area situated in the Bay of Bengal off the coast of the India and Bangladesh. It is an uninhabited piece of sandy island, formed as a result of silt deposition from both the Ganga and the Brahmaputra over centuries. It peeped out of the sea after a cyclone in 1970. Since then, both India and Bangladesh have been claiming sovereignty over the island as there was a speculation of oil and natural gas beneath the surface, which was never to be found. The Government of India hoisted the national flag in 1981 and established a temporary military base with our warships frequenting every now and then. It became a contentious issue and was having an important mention in the Indo-Bangla bilateral talks between various External Affairs Ministers and Prime Ministers of both the countries during the last four decades. The Radcliffe Award and the mid-channel flow principle (a.k.a. Thalweg Doctrine) were analysed threadbare by the bureaucrats serving at the External Affairs and Home Ministries of both the countires.

And out of the blue, before the problem could be bilaterally resolved and an amicable solution could be worked out, the Island itself has vanished into the sea! It happened a few weeks ago. Scientists of various universities across the globe have brainstormed the issue and have discovered that global warming resulting in the rise of mean sea level is the prime accused which has led to the unfortunate submergence of this Island. Before closing the respective files on this Island, the bureaucrats of both the countries would be drafting certain order sheet and file notings. That would be one of the most amusing documents written in the history of human civilisation!


4 comments:

  1. One of the order-sheet noting could be -

    "It has been reported by unconfirmed sources that the island of New Moore alias ... has submerged into the bay of Bengal due to global warming. This has been independently verified from the blog of Sh. N.Sathyamoorthy, a famed blogger. In this connection, following urgent steps would be immediately required-
    (i) Despatch a special task force by a chartered defence plane which would have Andaman as the base for carrying out repeated sorties in the Bay of Bengal [the undersigned offers himself as the convenor of the task force];

    (ii) A navy ship be deployed near the Indo-Bengal border to take care of any tensions arising out of the sorties;

    (iii) We may install a huge replica of the island at the place of its submergence so that future generations are not deprived of their heritage;

    (iv) Investigations should be carried out to fix the responsibility so that such future instances are avoided;

    (v) Hon'ble PM may like to issue a thanks giving letter to countries most responsible for Global Warming as they have been instrumental in ending at least one dispute between India & Bangladesh;


    & so on & so forth...."

    JAI HIND!

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  2. Hats off to Mr.Pankaj! He seems to be a seasoned bureaucrat. He has succintly brought out the satire behind how all the Governments would function. But the moot question is the underlying violence built in the very concept of modern nation-state. The EU model is a case in pointer. What if we have a Confederation of South Asian states? The multi-billion dollar military industrial complex would be at a loss and so will be its direct and secret beneficiaries. But the human population which is spread across all the great South Asian states would be more prosperous and the civilisation would definitely flourish as it was earlier. Any takers?

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  3. the red earth and pouring rainApril 21, 2010 at 10:34 AM

    My heart goes out to the solitude of that small piece of island which came into existence very recently, got into the moth-eaten suffocating files, had the existence of embarrasement on the tables of meetings/conferences and suddenly slipped into void. No poet, no child, no saint had set foot on that sand. Check out if atleast one bird or flower did touch those virgin land with its tender fingers.

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  4. Great minds at work

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